There were shepherds. They were hanging out in the fields, at night, when some totally glowing angel showed up and said, hey don’t be scared! But of course, if you ever get to see a real live angel of the Lord, you’ll probably pee your pants. I hear they’re quite impressive. But the angel was good, and said that there was a baby in some barn. A baby that was hugely important. And all they had to do was follow that star to get there, and they’d be glad they did. I’m thinking that would do it for me. I’d miss the whole thing because I always get lost. Follow a star? I can’t follow a GPS. It once took me 45 minutes to get 4 miles from my house, pretty much missing our son’s first gymnastics lesson, and causing him to cry over it for like, 2 hours. But, that was their instruction. That star? In the north. Go there. So they did. And I wonder what was up with their sheep. Did they take them? They were out there to protect them from smugglers and wolves and stuff, so did they just leave them? Did the angel put a protective force field around them? In any case, they went. Didn’t ask questions or talk back.
And they get to the barn. A barn because all of the land was traveling home to pay taxes. Apparently, all of the hotels had been booked for months. That part always chaps my hide. Here’s Mary, ready to deliver any day, and they had to travel to their hometown to pay the taxes. No online W2, or W4, I never remember the numbers. Anyway, very pregnant Mary and her totally awesome husband-to-be take a little donkey across the land to do their civil duty (He’s totally awesome because he believed the angel’s explanation that Mary had indeed, not been cheating on him, but had been impregnated by the Spirit of God. Now that’s a story to swallow. But the message did come from another angel, so stayed with her.). And yep, she starts having contractions. I can just see how great that felt on the back of a donkey. I couldn’t get relief in a warm jacuzzi with two shots of Fentanyl in my butt. So Joseph goes into action, knocking on the closest Ramadas, Marriots, Hampton Inns he can find. But due the whole come-home-and-pay-up affair, they were out of luck. Until one motel owner said, well, I’ve got a barn. I’m picturing being Mary. A barn? A stinking old barn with hay, and horse poop, and mooing cows, and chicken s*#t and all? I think I may have had a bad attitude about this. Not in my birthplan, Joe. But she was amazing calm with it, it seems, and that’s where they got ready to do the job. I wonder if Joseph had been talking with her sisters, her mother or his. Did he get some tips on emergency midwifery? What did they cut the cord with? Did they get fresh straw after the placenta was delivered? If not, eewwww.
But the child was delivered in that barn. Just the two of them, and I’m sure, the presence of the Lord. Afterall, you know he’d hate to miss the birth of his first born son. Again, Joseph was quite maganimous here. I like him. They somehow found some rags to wrap their amazing baby in. She was probably mift that she’d left her layette back home, but the recording of this event doesn’t mention it. I’d be mift. All that time and money getting ready for the baby and we end up with rags? And in time, the shepherds showed up, as did some really high officials in the evil King’s court. The story goes that they brought very expensive birth gifts. At least that. But my heart always wonders just what Mary was thinking when she held her baby for the first time. Could she possibly comprehend the gravity of what had just occured? Or was she just trying to get him to do a good latch on? All we get from the recording is that Mary treasured up all these things, and pondered them in her heart. I should think! I mean, no other laboring mom has the scene going on around her that this mom does. I thought my family was nuts with excitement, and shouting it from the roof tops when I went to LDR, but Mary? As she is post partum in that barn, that angel says to the shepherds, today, in the town of David (King David’s hometown, of course), a Savior has been born to you. What? Did they know what he was talking about? And then, the angel goes on. He is Christ, the Lord. You’ll know you’ve got the right baby when you find the one wrapped in rags in a barn. Wow. A Savior. That’s big news. But then, all of the heavens break out in song, thousands of angels singing together, and they belt out a praise tune to God, saying Glory to God on the highest, and on earth, peace be to all men. Talk about a birth announcement. Mary didn’t even have to worry if her order would be screwed up, or not come in in time, or have to hand address tons of cards. All of the heavens sang of her son’s, the Lord’s son’s, birth.
Merry Christmas to you all, and Happy Happy Birthday, Jesus. And a blessed Hanukkah to those of you celebrating the Maccabees reclaiming the temple, this festival of lights. Peace to us all.
