Geronimo!

…o-o-o-h, o-o-o-h…wish it were Sunday, o-o-o-h, o-o-o-h…

First. My stupid scales say I’m back up that presumably lost 2 pounds. Damn cream cheese-salsa dip. And damn the Fritos Scoops. They were my only splurge all weekend. Besides the wine. And it’s just wrong to damn wine. Maybe I’m retaining water.

Second…it’s time to play Monday Memories! So without further ado…I present (drumroll)…something I remember!!!

Monday Memories You know what I remember? I remember when I could come home from school and drink about 24 ounces of real Coke. And eat half a box of Cheez-its. And order a small Dominoe’s pizza. Eat the whole thing. Do a little homework after watching back to back M*A*S*H* re-runs sitting in my favorite arm chair. Have supper with my family. And eat 2 or 3 helpings of Momma’s fried chicken, rice and gravy. And. weigh. 100. pounds. That, my friends, is my memory for the day. Sadly self absorbed, but that’s it.

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It’s Monday Memories over at R2Ks (she graciously says I co-host, but really, I just tag along).

I feel a bit surly this morning. Just found out we’re out of coffee. Have quite a bit of housework to do (it. never. stops.). Am behind in laundry (it. never. stops. more.). AND. I weighed. That blasted scales says I’ve gained a pound. Not happy. Not happy about that at all. And what kind of person am I that lets some scales dictate the start-of-the-day-mood? How shallow can I be? Oh, apparently pretty shallow. I DID post a pic of myself to solicit opinions from the internet on MY HAIR. Gack.

So…my memory. Got it. Yesterday (yesterday is not the memory, just when it was jogged to the surface of my empty head), so yesterday, Speedreader went to the roller rink (why. do. kids. like. gross. places. for. parties.?) and I helped him lace up his skates. You know, I said. Yes, I do know Mom. Know what? You don’t even know what I was going to say. How can you *know*? You used to go skating when you were my age, {with slightly bored exasperation he replies}. Well, Mr. Know All In The Universe. Yes, I did, but that’s not what I was going to say. I was going to say, if you were cool, you would NOT stoop to renting skates. That was bad mojo. You owned your own, and you brought them in a cool bag, or slung casually over your shoulder. You would never put your holy skating feet in those nasty rentals. It just wasn’t done. {entertaining me, he asks} OK, mom, so what’d you do…Well, since you asked…I had my very own pair and they were AWESOME. They were gold glitter! I rocked! Let me tell YOU how your momma looked zipping around in the backwards skate…

All he could do was hang his head in embarrassment for me. He was simply agog that I would ever don something as ridiculous as gold glitter roller skates. I’m telling you, they were sweet. Whadda kids today know, anyway. And why hasn’t someone kept a better picture of my kind of skates? They’re a classic. All I could find was this blurry shot, but the memory was so warm, I had to go with it. Groovy, baby, groovy.

This. This is the face they gave me when I recorded my weight. Recorded it honestly. Recorded against my better judgment. And then they have to judge me! Me, who paid them $65 to help me watch my weight. I did not mean to sign up for expressionless, condemnatory faces. I want a cheery smile no matter what my weight is. Is that asking too much? A little support when it didn’t turn out the way I hoped? Forget it. I’m hanging out at P2G. They like me over there, or at least, pretend they do. WW, you’re fired. And you know what? You’re ugly too. And I don’t like you. (this is where I stick out my tongue)

1. cool beans wants to know what we do without the TV. Well, I’m only partly able to answer. We only went TV free part of the day. It was a half TV Free Tuesday. But I promise to make it up another day this week. Do make up days count? Can I still keep the cutie TV Free Tuesday button. Please? This, I can report, and it was good. I just bailed later in the day. Got busy, had to tutor someone in the must-dos when beginning homeschooling, and just said, aaawwww crap, just go watch TV. No. Really I said, you’ve been really good and imaginative all day (til 4 pm), you wanna watch a cartoon or two? That really is what I said.

What we did up til then is as follows:
Legos, Legos, Legos, pretend we’re dogs, pretend we’re cats, work in our new calendars, our morning chores, some laundry, drew sea turtles hatching eggs, baby turtles clawing towards the ocean, drew baby puppies with momma dogs, kittens with momma cats, a really bad horse (that was me), wrestled, got hurt and cried, stopped wrestling, counted the turtles eggs that were drawn, made lunch, had a long lunch, cleaned up after lunch, and by then, my friend was here. But it’s Andy Griffith for Pete’s sake! Right now, Opie’s getting called out by his teacher right in front of the whole class, and Sherriff Andy’s getting blamed for his not doing his homework (class erupts in chaos). It’s practically educational. I’m going to call it Mid Century Modern Social Studies. Now that’s a great class. We might do Mr. Ed next. It’s Husbandry.

2. What the h*ll is up with WW telling me my 25 minutes of wing flapping fun on the bike is only worth one activity point??? One measly point? I can burn more calories lifting a 1.5 liter of a good red wine. Shoot…that stinks really smelly.

3. I’ve noticed that the word verification dealy with which many of us must leave comments makes really funny words or sounds, or something, sometimes. I think I’m going to start a list, and post them. Yeah. Maybe that one’s not taken, or copywrited. Now what to call it…

Sucking in my belly all day, against the jeans that are too tight? Because this is my chosen exercise of the day. I joined up over at Pounds2Go. Leanne’s doing something else amazing. And probably exercising. I am too, right now as I type this. I’m sucking in. Hard. It’s like vertical ab work. And doing some light upper arm weight work with my 4 oz. pour of Pinot Grigio. Now this is a diet I can live with. OK, seriously. I am doing these things, but I also drank nearly 2 gallons (really, I measured) of water today, and have only consumed 14 of my 20 alloted WW points. 4 of which were sucked up by that stinky Slim Fast. Won’t do that again. I was only hungry for about an hour, and finally decided, screw that, I need to eat some sort of healthy snack. So I did. A couple of grahams, a Laughing Cow Lite wedge, and some carrots. Yep. Just like queso dip and Fritos. Gack.

Just had to post, to stay current with the motivation groove. All 10 hours of it. Gonna put it up over at P2G, so had to practice here. Here’s to ditching 13 pounds. Maybe they’ll fall off in my glass.